Edward and I were not able to meet up outside of the center all week. A New Moon Rises was down a person, so I wasn't able to take more than a fifteen minute lunch break each day. Friday finally came around, and I was exhausted. Edward offered to change our cooking date to Saturday night, but I declined. I was looking forward to the semi-alone time.
I left work around 6:30; Leah let me leave a little early because of all the overtime I had put in. I quickly drove home to change, then headed to Edward's house.
(knock, knock)
"Bellaaaa!" Alexis yelled, opening the door.
I could hear Edward scolding her the moment she opened it, "Lexi, don't open the door, yet! Wait for me."
"Hey, Lexi," I said, bending down to pick her up. "Are you ready to help your dad cook dinner?" I asked, and she nodded her head.
Alexis leaned her face towards mine and I smiled as we nuzzled our noses in our traditional Eskimo Kiss.
Edward walked up behind her and his face lit up with a smile that reached his eyes.
I could stare at his smiling face all day. I sighed.
"Hello, beautiful," he said, placing a chaste kiss on my lips. "Long time no see." He closed the door behind me and led us into the kitchen.
"I know, I've missed you. Thank goodness for those five minutes it takes to walk to my car every night, otherwise I would be going through some withdrawals," I told him.
"Withdrawals? From what?" he asked, giving me that cocky smirk of his.
"Those lips of yours." I winked.
"Mmm, I feel the same way," he said, wrapping his arms around Alexis and myself and kissing me again, letting his lips linger a little longer this time.
"Daddy, stop kissing Bella. She's here for me."
I felt him smile against my lips.
"Alright, let's finish making this dinner because I'm going to be hungry soon," he said.
"Finish? You mean you started without me?" I questioned, pretending to be upset.
"Well," he said, his hand going through his hair. "I didn't want us eating around ten o'clock, so I already put the pork in the oven and boiled the pasta. We still need to shred the cheese and cook the green beans."
"And salad," Alexis added.
"Yes, and the salad."
"What are you cooking, a feast for ten?" I teased.
"No, I'm just excited that I get to cook for someone besides Lexi here."
"I see." I smiled. "So many hidden talents, Dr. Cullen. Okay, what do you need Lexi and I to do?" I asked, tickling her belly.
"Lets color, Bella," Alexis said through her giggles, trying to push my hand away.
"You don't want to help your dad cook?"
"Nope." She shook her head.
"That's fine, I can handle the cooking on my own. You ladies go make some beautiful artwork to cover my fridge," he said, gesturing towards the kitchen appliance that had a couple of photos on it.
"I was actually looking forward to watching you work with your hands," I said, sheepishly.
"Bellaaa, Dora can’t wait! We have to help her save the mermaid princess."
"Okay," I laughed, placing her on her feet. "You go get your coloring stuff and I'll be there in a second."
"Yay!" she exclaimed, running to the stairs.
"So, you were going to watch me cook, eh?" he said, hooking his fingers through my belt loops and pulling me towards him.
"Well, yeah. I can't watch you at work so I figured this was the next best thing," I said, leaning up and pecking his lips.
"I'm a pediatrician, not a surgeon. It's not the same."
"You still use your hands for a living and at one point, you were going to be a surgeon." I grabbed one of them and brought it in front of us to examine it better. "I mean, look at these fingers. The way they must feel against a throat as you check to see if the glands are swollen," I said, tracing his fingers with my own. "I am so thankful you work with children and not adults."
"Why is that?"
"Because I already have to go in there and show those nurses that you're taken. I wouldn't be able to do that with every patient that came through the doors."
He threw his head back and laughed.
"I'm serious," I said, smacking his chest playfully.
"Oh, I'm sure you are, but you have nothing to worry about," he said, cupping the side of my face, rubbing my cheek with the pad of his thumb. "I only have eyes for you." He placed a soft, gentle kiss against my lips.
"Bella, let's go!" Alexis ordered, pulling my arm.
"Yes, Bella, go," he said, playfully swatting my butt.
We sat down at the table and colored. She picked out a Beauty and the Beast coloring book for me and she colored Dora the Explorer. We both complimented each other on our pictures. For a three-year-old, she did a great job of staying in the lines. Edward brought us both drinks: juice for her, wine for me; and placed kisses on the top of our heads as he walked by. Alexis and I chatted about her friends from the center. She told me one of the girls didn't like her because Alexis was 'going out' with the boy she liked.
"Who is this Chris kid?" Edward asked, eavesdropping on our conversation.
"Just some boy Lexi plays with," I answered.
"I like him and he likes me, daddy," Alexis added.
"So what? Is he like your boyfriend or something?" he asked, bringing over the salad dressing.
Alexis nodded her head.
"I have two. Mark-n-Chris."
"What?!" he exclaimed, not too happy.
"It's harmless, Edward," I told him, resting my hand on the side of his arm. "Chris is the same boy who gave me flowers last week."
"So now he's two-timing my daughter? I thought boys are supposed to have cooties or something," he said in disgust.
"Nah, that's not ‘til elementary school- that's when boys really get disgusting," I explained, scrunching my nose in disgust. "Right now they're just sweet and adorable. They're still their mommy's little angel who can do no wrong."
"Well that's a load of sh...a load of crud. I was young once, too, and I remember what it was like. I used to push the girls I liked down and throw dirt at them. I don't want any little boy doing that to my baby girl."
"You'd be surprised at how well your daughter can handle herself. I think your nephews have taught her a thing or two. In fact, it was Lexi here who pushed Chris down," I smirked. "He was a total goner after that."
"So, what do boyfriend and girlfriends do at that age?" he asked, curious.
"They just hold hands when they walk together, play in the sandbox, sometimes I see them pushing her on the swing, they pick her flowers, and sometimes kiss on the cheek. Don't worry, we keep it G-rated."
"You'll tell me if it gets too out of hand?" he asked, worried.
"Of course, Edward," I answered, running my fingers through his hair, trying to ease his worries. "I don't think these three-year-olds will be making out anytime soon," I whispered in his ear.
"Hey, I've heard stories where little kids are showing their private parts to each other. I don't want any of that," he whispered back.
"None of that will be going on, believe me." I pecked his lips then went back to coloring.
He finished making dinner while Alexis and I talked about our favorite movies and shows. We imitated Dori from Finding Nemo and made up our own whale calls, Edward even joined in on that. Every once in awhile I would look up and catch Edward staring at us, a huge grin on his face.
About thirty minutes later, Edward was bringing over our plates.
"Bella, daddy gonna give me a Dora party," Alexis said, taking a bite.
"He is? For what?" I asked, curious.
"I be four," she said, holding up four fingers.
"You're turning four? When?" I asked, turning my attention to Edward.
"May 25...my mom is planning this big party for her even though it's a month and a half away. Of course, you’re invited," he said, grasping my hand.
"That sounds like fun...of course I'll come."
"Um... do you have plans for Easter? Rosalie and my mom are planning an Easter egg hunt in the backyard for the kids, then we'll have brunch. I'd like you to come."
"I was actually planning on driving down to Forks with Leah and Jake to visit my dad," I told him, sadly. "I haven't seen him in over a month. I feel like I’ve been an awful daughter, neglecting him. I'm just glad he isn't all alone down there."
"Does your dad have a lady friend?" he asked, wiggling his eyebrows.
"Apparently he does; it's his best friend's widow. Harry died when I was a senior in high school. He said they've been hanging out for the past couple of years and have slowly fallen in love. I've met Sue numerous times, but never as his girlfriend so he wants to do the big introduction that weekend, and her son, Seth, will be in town visiting from college. Otherwise, I would've loved to spend Easter with you and your family."
When we finished eating, I stood up to take my plate to the sink. Edward told me to leave it, that he'd do it later. After dinner, we all sat down on the sofa to watch a movie before Alexis had to go to bed. She picked out Enchanted. Knowing the movie and the catchy songs, I found myself humming along. Alexis ended up falling asleep half way through; Edward carried her upstairs to bed.
While I waited, I washed the dishes. I was almost done when I felt his presence behind me. He slid his hands down my arms and stopped when they reached my hands."I thought I told you to leave these," he whispered in my ear. He took the cup out of my hand and placed a soft kiss just below my ear. "As my girlfriend and a guest, you are not suppose to clean up." He kissed the same spot making me shiver. "You are suppose to be relaxing. I know you've had a rough week."
I turned my body around and rested my wet hands on his chest. He inched his face closer to mine, stopping just inches from my lips.
All I had to do was nudge forward and I would feel those amazing sparks, but I didn't want to push my luck, just yet.
"You are making it really hard to resist you."
He brushed my lips once, then again, and again. He was toying with me and he knew it. He was enjoying it, I could feel his smile. I sighed in frustration. He pulled me closer to him, capturing my lips. My hands slid around his back and I pressed against those strong muscles, pulling him closer to me.
In the background, I could hear the song that changes everything for the lead characters playing.
You’re in my arms
And all the world is calm
The music playing on for only two
So close together
And when I’m with you
So close to feeling alive
Edward started to sway our bodies as our lips parted. I moved my arms around his neck and rested my head on his shoulder as we danced in his kitchen. I could hear him singing some of the lyrics softly.
A life goes by
Romantic dreams will stop
So I bid mine goodbye and never knew
So close was waiting, waiting here with you
And now forever I know
All that I wanted to hold you
So close
When Edward twirled us around after the chorus, it felt like we were dancing on a cloud. It felt nice to be so carefree.
The song ended and we pulled apart.
"Come on, let's watch a different movie." He grabbed my hand and led us to the couch.
I sat down, pulling my knees into my chest, as Edward popped in another movie.
"What are we watching?" I asked, as he sat next to me. He threw his arm around my shoulder and propped his feet up on the coffee table.
"The Dark Knight. Have you seen it yet?"
"No, but I've been meaning to- I love Christian Bale. Did you know that my favorite movie of his is a musical?"
"No. Christian Bale was in a musical?" he asked, thinking I was lying to him.
"Yup, Newsies. I have it at my apartment. We'll have to watch it sometime."
"I'm not a big fan of musicals, but for you, I'll watch it," he said, kissing my temple.
"It's cheesy, but I love it." I smiled, getting comfortable. I propped my feet on the coffee table next to his and nuzzled into his side, resting my arm over his stomach.
After thirty minutes of watching the movie, I started to feel restless. Edward's scent was distracting me; I kept smelling his shirt as discreetly as I could. It was a mixture of fabric softener, Irish Spring, and a scent I couldn't pinpoint.
"What are you doing?" he asked, looking down at me with curious eyes.
"Oh, you saw that?" I asked, embarrassed.
"Yes, why are you sniffing me?"
"Because you smell good," I said, biting my bottom lip.
"You're getting restless, aren't you?" he asked, as I sat up.
"A little," I said, grabbing my wine glass and taking a sip.
"Well, what do you want to do?" he asked, taking a drink of his own.
"Oh, I'm sure I could think of something to entertain us."
I put the glass back down and curled my feet under my legs as I sat back against his arm. He started twirling my hair around his finger and I ran my right hand through his hair, stroking his locks. He closed his eyes, reveling in the feeling. I licked my lips and made my move; first placing a kiss on his dimple chin then moving to his lips.
I toyed with him, just like he did with me earlier. I softly pressed my lips to his for one kiss, then another, and another. I stopped to see what his eyes were saying; I didn't want to overstep my boundaries in his house. It was one thing to make out in his car and in front of my place, but another to do it in his house with his daughter upstairs sleeping. His sparkling green eyes were burning, full of want and desire. Edward nudged his face forward, capturing my lips in a soft and supple way. His left hand moved to the back of my head, tangling my hair in his fingers. He parted his lips slightly, sucking on my bottom lip.
Eventually, he slipped his tongue in and pulled me into his lap. I moved to straddle his legs, never once breaking the kiss. My hands cupped his face as we both fought for control. Edwards right hand moved up and down my back making my body tingle. His left one moved from my hair, sliding down the side of my body and I felt his thumb graze the side of my covered breast. His hands rested on my hips, squeezing, as my hips instinctively bucked forward.
We both moaned into each other’s mouths. His hands moved around to my front; he unbuttoned the rest of my shirt. I pulled my hands away from his face so he could take it off. Once it was, Edward pulled away, but he didn't stop kissing me. He placed sensual, wet kisses down my neck; my skin felt on fire. He moved the strap of my tank and bra to the side so he could continue the kisses along my collar bone and did the same thing on the other side. He tugged on my tank and I lifted my arms to help him take it off. The moment it was, Edward moved down to my newly exposed skin, placing searing hot kisses along my cleavage.
Considering I was now just in my bra and jeans, I thought it was only fair that he be shirtless too. I pulled his shirt up enough to sneak my hands under, my nails teased his toned chest and six pack abs. I felt him shiver under my touch and I smiled. I tugged his shirt up, making him pull away and raise his arms to get it off. I tossed it on the floor and crashed my lips to his, placing my hands on his shoulders. I could feel his hard-on through his shorts and again, I bucked my hips. He moaned again and that sound was enough for me to make my next move. I trailed my nails down his chest to his shorts. I hooked a finger in the fabric, moving it back and forth, from hip bone to hip bone. I started to unbutton them and Edward immediately froze. He stopped kissing me and pulled back.
"Bella, stop," he said, breathless.
He removed my hands from his body and placed them at my side.
"It's okay, Edward. I want to." I leaned in, trying to kiss him, but he pulled his face away.
"No, Bella, stop!" he ordered.
I looked at him, trying to decipher his thoughts. I saw regret, sadness, worry and confusion. I could feel the tears start to pool in my eyes.
"I'm sorry," I apologized.
I got off him and frantically looked around for my shirts. I couldn't get out of there fast enough. I chanced a look at Edward and he was pinching the bridge of his nose, his eyes closed. I felt the pain more as the tears fell down my face, there was no stopping them. The minute I found my tank and shirt, I high-tailed out of there, stopping long enough just to grab my purse. I heard Edward yell my name, but I didn't stop, I couldn't.
He just rejected me.
I didn't want to be alone, so I drove to Alice's place.
I knocked on her door and Jasper answered. He took one look at my tearful face and pulled me into his chest. I let out a sob and cried even harder."Jasper, who is it?" Alice asked, skipping to the door in her pajamas.
I lifted my head, slightly.
"Oh, Bella, what did he do?" she asked, wrapping her arms around us.
"He didn't do anything, Alice. I did it." I shook my head in Jasper's chest.
"Come on, let's take this inside," Jasper suggested.
He let Alice take me into the apartment. We sat down on the couch; she rubbed my back as Jasper brought a box of tissues over. They both let me cry my eyes out."Do you want to talk about it?" Alice asked.
"Not right now, I just want to sleep on it. Do you mind if I stay here tonight? I really don't want to be alone."
"Yeah, that's no problem. We can talk about it in the morning," she said pulling me into a hug.
"Thanks, Alice."
"You should have some clothes in there. Try to get a good nights sleep," she said as we stood up.
I gave her a weak smile and made my way to the spare bedroom. I changed, brushed my teeth then got into bed. I debated checking my phone and of course I gave in, wanting to see if he called or texted me. And he sent me a message.
I'm sorry. Don't be upset. It's my fault. Call me, please.
I read that message about twenty times before I put my phone down. I cried myself to sleep that night.
The next morning, I woke up to the fresh smell of coffee. I rolled out of bed and shuffled my feet to the kitchen.
Both Alice and Jasper were sitting at the table, eating bagels, drinking their coffees and looking at a section of the paper.They are so homey together, it's adorable.
"Mornin’," I mumbled. Normally I am a morning person, but not today.
Alice took one look at me and asked, "Oh, honey, you cried yourself to sleep didn't you?"
I just nodded as I pulled a cup out of the cabinet and poured some coffee, taking a sip. I felt a little better feeling the steaming hot liquid run down my throat. I made myself a bagel and took a seat at the table.
"Did he call you?" Alice asked, folding up the paper and placing it down on the table.
"He sent me a message. He apologized...said it was his fault, but it wasn't, Ali. I pushed him too hard, he wasn't ready. He told me to stop, I felt rejected, so I got up and left."
"He didn't come after you?"
"I don't know. I heard him call my name, but I couldn't go back. I was too embarrassed."
"Alright, start from the beginning."
I proceeded to tell Alice and Jasper everything that happened. She loved that we danced together, because she knows I don't dance.
"Bella, I'm so sorry. I know that took a lot for you to give yourself like that."
"I don't plan on doing that again. I just don't get it, Alice. He says he's ready, that he wants to be with me, but what- he just likes my company? If he's not ready for the physical part, then he shouldn't have taken my shirts off and allowed me to do the same to him."
"What did you expect, Bella? Were you honestly going to give him a blow job on his couch? With his daughter upstairs asleep?"
I heard Jasper snort next to me.
I hadn't thought about that. I was so wrapped up in the moment that nothing else mattered. I'm an idiot.
"Where were you last night? I really could have used your wisdom then," I said, smacking Jasper in the arm, which only made him laugh more.
"Well, obviously Edward is beating himself up as much as you are."
"I just don't get why he won't move forward, Alice," I said.
"Complains the girl who ran away from her boyfriend. Last night would've been a perfect night to ask."
"He rejected me, Alice. I was hurt and I didn't want him to see how hurt I was by his actions," I said, biting my bottom lip. "I really screwed this up, didn't I?"
"No, you two just need to talk. Call him, I'm sure he's waiting for your phone call."
"Yeah, maybe you're right," I sighed.
"No, I know I'm right, Bella. I have a good feeling about you two, and you know better than to go against my feelings. Just go ask Jake if you don't believe me," she pointed her finger at me.
"No, I know. Thanks for letting me crash here guys."
"Anytime, Bells."
"Based on what Alice has told me about you and Edward, I think he's scared," Jasper said, grabbing my hand. "Being scared doesn't mean he doesn't want to be with you, it just means that he's protecting himself. You're the first woman he has had feelings for since his wife died, right?"
"Yeah."
"Maybe he's afraid that if he moves too fast, he'll spook you and you'll leave."
"No, I do enough spooking on my own." I sighed. "Alright guys, I'm going to head home and give Edward a call. Thanks again." I stood up, cleaned my dishes then headed out, but not before giving them both a hug.
On my drive home, I was able to reach him.
"Bella," he sighed. "I'm so sorry. You did nothing wrong, it was all me."
"Edward, do you mind meeting at my place? I think we need to talk."
"I'm already on my way."
"I'll see you soon," I said before hanging up the phone.
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